Kill Jill by John Locke

Author:John Locke [Locke, John]
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9781939337375
Amazon: B00AQO1X1A
Publisher: Calibre
Published: 0101-01-01T08:00:00+00:00

The dancers and lickers quietly withdraw and the men form a wide circle around the car. With the women and children sitting on the ground in front of them, the men assume a crouching, wide-legged, fighting stance. Each warrior locks elbows with the man on either side of him.

“Oh, shit!” Jill says.

“Now what?”

“I forgot about the Circle of Hell.”

“The what?”

“No one gets in, no one gets out. Except the Jester and maidens. And we’re stuck in the middle.”

“I thought we’d have a chance to get away when the Jester showed up,” Jack says.

“Really? The way our luck’s been going tonight?”

“Hey, my luck hasn’t been so bad.”

She looks at him incredulously.

He shrugs. “I got laid, didn’t I?”

Jill frowns. “You got beat up by four different people, three of whom are still in the trunk. You killed four hunters who planned to rape you. You blew up my car. A policeman was shot. We’re running for our lives because my husband wants to kill us, but you made a wrong turn that put us in the middle of the most insane festival known to man. We’re trapped here, in the Circle of Hell, and policemen are coming, and—”

“What do you mean, ‘policemen are coming?’”

“They invite county police to the dinner and boat launch part.”

“Why?”

“To prove they’re not actually sacrificing virgins.”

“You’re telling me the police will be here any minute?”

“If they’re not here already.”

It’s hard to see out of the bug-smeared, saliva-soaked windows, but everyone’s attention seems fixed on some torches approaching from the east. In the truck, the Fosters pick this moment to start kicking and screaming.

“We’ve got to get out of here,” Jack says.

He turns the windshield wipers on, presses the button to spray the wiper fluid. It takes a few seconds, but the fluid affords them a small field of vision amid the streaks and smears.

“If only we’d stolen a Dodge,” Jack says.

“Why?”

“So I could say let’s get the Dodge out of hell!”

“Yes, but why would you?”

“Don’t you get it? Instead of saying ‘let’s get the hell out of Dodge?’”

She groans. “I got it the first time.”

Jack says, “I thought you were the one who likes word-play.”

“Jack.”

“What?”

“If you’ve got a plan, execute it now. Because the women and children are coming over to check our trunk.”

“No time to see the topless ladies?”

“They’re only topless for the chicken chase.”

“And that already happened?”

“Hours ago.”

“In that case, brace yourself!”

Jack presses the horn, throws the car in gear, and peels out. The Vikings are wide-eyed, but hold their positions, daring him to run them down. The women and children are less daring.

They scatter.

Jack speeds up.

As the car closes in on the men blocking their way, Jack says, “I’m not going to stop.”

“You can’t just kill them.”

“It’s their job to move.”

The Vikings agree. At the last moment, they jump out of the way, and the Oldsmobile barrels down the highway.

“Oh my God, Jack!” she shouts. “That was amazing!”

“Circle of Hell, my ass!” he says.

“Keep going straight,” Jill says, as they approach the interstate.

He passes the

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